Too many things on my mind.

Lately I haven’t been on wordpress much. It all started on 13th this month. I was eagerly waiting for the result of this Job interview that i went through the week before. Till this day I was very clear about my career path for the next year or so. That day passed with little celebrations and a few congratulation calls from friends and family. Seemed like a pretty good day to me. The worst followed the next day. I received an email stating that I have made it to an MBA college I applied for. Well this, at first, seemed like a WOW moment. Getting two things that i always wanted to. But then, I had to decide which one to let go and which one to hold on. That is when the hardest part starts. Then next few days passed horribly with me along with my family brainstorming about both the options but still the balance was equally weighted for both of them. I had sleepless nights, not because I was worried or anxious but because I was up all night chatting with seniors ,employees and Ex-employees about the credibility of choosing that stake. There was a time I would make up my mind for one, and the next morning I was completely blank why I chose that. It was like you were given a choice to take home Either Angelina Jolie and Scarlet Johansson. None seemed better over other and none seemed lesser of other. I was too scared to flip a coin because I thought the coin would not come down.
In a day or two I got pretty pissed off. Nobody giving me a straight answer. Though one of my closest friend (Raunaq) was trying very hard to convince me into job. I really appreciate his effort there and his friendship throughout my graduation. But the thing was I was too skeptical about myself, I felt I may not succeed in the MBA entrance exams two years from now. I failed to trust my ability. I always boasted a practical personality, but here I realized the true me. After a lot of data crunching and anticipating the future prospects that might be best for me with the advice of a few i trust, I settled for one. The Job. But these 7 days have been the longest and the most mentally torturing days of my life. I couldn’t even celebrate for the happiness i received. In-fact I dont remember being happy these 7 days. All i remember is being worried and anxious and checking my facebook profile every 15 mins for any messages from people I’ve been consulting about this. And I am not happy about this. There were times I wished that I hadn’t got both these opportunities at the same time. But as it turns out or rather as it had to turn out, I voted for one and now I have accepted the fact that I will have to live with the consequences whatever they may be.

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